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Category: Golf
Previous guy's an alien, “…because when you're a star they let you do it”
Former President Trump ordered the Pentagon to release all of its information on “unidentified aerial phenomena” (UAP) within 18 days in his last coronavirus relief bill in December 2020. More inexplicable … Read More
WYFP? don't call tankies Cheugy, it's the new “neat” or “nifty”
MFP is neologisms that get sticky. Cheugy is the latest, being a term that Generation Z calls Millennials, perhaps it’s the revival of more postmodernism. Generation Z consumer-brand attacks on … Read More
Proud Boys leader to former guy: 'F*ck you Trump. You left us on the battlefield bloody and alone'
Pat yourself on the back if you sized Donald Trump up in two minutes, like a normal person. You could have instead been Ethan Nordean, who wasted years of his … Read More
Big Orange Liar calls his 2020 loss a jewelry heist like a Pink Panther film
‘The Diamonds Must Be Returned’: Pretending that Democrats did a smash and grab only reminds us of the insurrection. Previous Guy must have been watching a diamond heist movie amidst … Read More
CA-Gov: New Poll Shows Growing Opposition To GOP Recall Efforts Against Gov. Gavin Newsom (D)
Here’s the big news today out of California: The campaign to recall Gov. Gavin Newsom has failed to gain momentum in recent months as significantly more California voters favor keeping … Read More
Gaetz of Hell-no: it wasn't me, it was the… wait for it… Deep State!
Gaetz made a speech to a Trumpist women’s group at previous guy’s Doral golf club, because that’s the best previous guy can do. The Group W bench. The deep state, Matty … Read More
The GOP and TrumpWorld appear to be bailing on Gross Gaetz
I’m not sure what Matt Gaetz expected. After all, the only exercise Donald Trump ever gets involves golf, languorous coitusTM, and throwing former “friends” under the bus. (Again, Trump has … Read More
Marjorie Taylor Greene reveals that the cure for COVID-19 is … pumping iron!
This is weird for a lot of reasons. First of all, Marjorie Taylor Greene’s superhero, Pervert Hoover, thinks exercise is bad for you. (Assuming it’s not golf, of course.) Secondly, if … Read More
Minerva @ Midnight: previous guy's now crashing Mar-a-Lago wedding parties to make speeches
He’s now posing as his own Walmart greeter. Trump regularly crashed random wedding receptions at his Bedminster NJ golf club, because he simply likes that opening-the-car-dealership shtick, and copping a feel from the bride … Read More
Trump’s secret sit-down with republican Ohio candidates turns into ‘Hunger Games’
If you are surprised by this headline, you haven’t been watching Donald J. Trump close enough. Donald Trump is Coriolanus Snow, the authoritarian president of Panem in the Hunger Games. … Read More
March 4 will not be a day of “camo, bear-spray, and noose enthusiasts”
Likely there will some stunt somewhere today, perhaps not in DC. Hopefully there will be no casualties, but nothing will match the easing of mask mandates in Texas and Mississippi. Perhaps … Read More
Seven people died on 1/6. Seven GOP senators voted for justice
The GQP senate is an honor-free zone with pro-wrestling byplay, save the magnificent seven dead. Mitch McConnell is doing his best to keep the reality-TV show kayfabe going. Lindsey Graham who … Read More
The Daily Bucket–Goose with a thousand names
The local internet buzzed. The local goose had tangled itself in a loose strand of fishing line, with a barbed lure tearing at her throat. The local goose was an … Read More
So this is how Trump gets to spend his sad, lonely retirement
Normally I’d say this is overkill and/or unnecessarily rubbing salt in the wounds of a broken man, but by all appearances, Donald Trump doesn’t grasp his true place in the … Read More
Trump Organization is in financial freefall as the Bigly One returns to the helm
The losing continues with a 35% decline in revenues for 47 entities as Ahab returns to his white whale. Banks are bailing out on Trump as loans will be coming … Read More
GOP congressman pretends Trump had a vaccination plan that Biden wants to steal
Donald Trump is gone, but the gaslighting on his behalf continues. Rep. Steve Scalise is trying to plant this little brain parasite in our heads so we all think the … Read More
The Big Lie is another Lost Cause, but Trump will keep telling it
Even as DC is now better prepared for a “million militia march” on 20 January, the likelihood is that only the most foolhardy will lay their lives down for Trump’s … Read More
PGA to move 2022 championship from Trump's golf resort
Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Chickens! Coming home to roost! So, so many chickens—and nary a McNugget sauce pack to be found. True comeuppance(s)! Final-fuckin’-leeeeeeeeee! NJ.com: The PGA … Read More
Only the useful idiots will pay the price of sedition.
Impeachment? Trump will be impeached in the House but in the Senate all but a few republicans will vote against him and thus be complicit in an attempted coup. They … Read More
surviving the next month of COVID-19: “You have to assume pandemic is going to get worse” -Fauci
Meanwhile, Trump’s on the golf course today. Anthony Fauci, the nation’s top infectious diseases expert, said on Tuesday that America has to assume that the coronavirus pandemic is going to … Read More
Trump reportedly 'angered' by renovations at his post-presidential villain's lair
Well, it’s not quite the same as drowning in a shallow pool of his own flop sweat, but anything that irritates this gormless, tumescent-headed, retrograde fuckstick delights me. CNN: His … Read More
Trump golf resort joins liberals' War on Christmas, wishes everyone 'Happy Holidays'
I have to admit, I always forget about my War on Christmas obligations — which include buying the “Fuck Christmas!” cookies and hanging mistletoe over the latest amalgam of carbon atoms … Read More
corrosion and catastrophes: James Fallows on what Biden should do with the warlock hunt
Stories do have consequences, and following Trump’s American Carnage, truth will out in the larger American narrative. This James Fallows essay is worth reading, made important by the trial balloon of … Read More
Unhingery: “No candidate has ever won both Florida and Ohio and lost. I won them both, by a lot!”
Why bother counting the votes after Dixville Notch weighs in. Dick Nixon won both Ohio and Florida in 1960 and lost to Kennedy. But you do you Donald, it’s still 1-52 in failed legal … Read More
Ivanka considering run for Congress or even Governor of Florida
Sadly, Ivanka might actually be better than the existing Florida governor 'Ivanka definitely has political ambitions, no question about it,' a source who has been working closely with the Trump family … Read More
Trump's Madame Tussaud wax dummy is now a retired golfer
So you know that inert, phlegmatic, squishy wad of wax that’s been standing around for four years collecting dust and loogies? Madame Tussaud’s has made a dummy that looks just … Read More
As U.S. COVID deaths approach 300,000, Melania unveils the new White House tennis court
December 7, 2020 — a day which will live in tennis history! Big news, dead Americans! You have a new White House tennis court to look down on as you … Read More
Fools and their money are soon parted.
Conman in Chief Donnie “Pass the Snake oil” Trump and his psychotic sycophantic shyster Rudy “preemptively pardon me please” Giuliani know all to well and have set up a slush … Read More
Trump declares Twitter a national security threat because it's more important than Iran for 53 days
Trump’s doing nothing about the continuing rise in Covid cases, and is spending his time at golf and continuing to sow chaos on the path to the bunker. Meanwhile the … Read More
Trump freaks everyone out on his scorched earth farewell and provides comic relief while golfing.
Horrid numbers of new cases of covid infections and deaths, economic turmoil, racial injustice, foreign policy, and the climate catastrophe are bearing down on us. Trump golfs and plots ways … Read More
IMPOTUS* resoundingly lost his reelection and (still) claims he actually won. Exile could be next
Trump’s Gettysburg Address was not the Four Seasons Total Landscaping that one might expect, but he may have one eventually somewhere as an exiled POTUS*. Unlike all the Napoleons and French … Read More
Never mind COVID: Trump is focused on bringing back firing squads
Donald Trump has frequently referred to COVID-19 as an “invisible enemy” — which may be why he’s pretending he doesn’t see it. The coronavirus outbreak is worse than it’s ever … Read More
Trump skips G20 pandemic-preparedness event to … uh, you know where he went
This fucking guy. I mean, really. CNN: It does not appear President Trump will participate in a side-event at the G20 virtual summit focused on pandemic preparedness. The event — … Read More
Can President Jim Crow pardon himself like a turkey
Trump could try to pardon himself, but it is more likely that he could resign and VP Pence could pardon him, much like the ceremony on Tuesday, live and domestic. … Read More
2020 Loser Trump's now closer to becoming an OANNanist.
Regular Trump golf partner Chris Ruddy disclaims any NewsMax takeover by Trump who was only offered a weekly spot among the documentaries of “Hitler’s rise” programming. Trump seems now more … Read More
POTUS* does a drive-by waving for the teeming thousand(s) because Joe Biden flipped 5 Trump states
Lemmings, with the Secret Service locked and loaded. Was this also a protest of DC gyms’ occupancy limits? x This loser parade must’ve left their self respect at home. https://t.co/ztC8SLOMUC— … Read More
Scotland may look at 'serious and long-standing concerns about Trump's business activities'
Don’t dangle Twitter threads like this in front of me when my heart is already bursting with schadenfreude. Are you trying to kill me, Twitter? It’s too much! Quick, someone … Read More
Warning: C5 Hissy-Fit Brewing in DC
You’re Fired! Rings out from every room! Tin hats being issued to everyone in the White House! A sweaty naked orange blip hands twitching on a cell phone has been … Read More
#ByeDon From hate to healing. The networks call the campaign over. Cities erupt in celebration.
The road back will be long. What is troubling are the 70 million people who voted for hate and cruelty. It is time for healing, as America stops at the brink of … Read More
“least racist” Trump says he's “perhaps the most innocent man anywhere in US history” expect a stunt
How many votes remain to be counted? Exit polls show fewer late-deciders than in 2016 Trump-Clinton contest, but Trump seemed to maintain numbers where he needed, numbers that would still defeat … Read More
I voted for by far the lesser bullsh1t
Admittedly I had a choice of two The snake-oil-salesman from New York Crazy Uncle Snowflake Joe Biden I certainly didn’t vote for the narcissistic sociopath/psychopath whose idea of a hard … Read More
Trump once ordered milkshakes during a highly classified intel meeting
Spin the wheel of presidential absurdity! Where will it land today? Let’s see. Nukin’ hurricanes, border moat, injecting disinfectant, dry-humping the flag, windmill cancer, invisible planes … and today it’s … ordering … Read More
The Daily Bucket–The West Side Gang moves in.
For 20 years, I’ve tracked the movements of herons and egrets where I’ve worked and walked. I’d been working at a golf course in Banks Oregon, 20 miles west of … Read More
Sr. WH official: 'There are reports that COVID is spreading like wildfire through the White House'
So a plague is ripping through the White House and no one knows what to do or what’s really going on, as top officials downplay the threat and keep everyone … Read More
Compassion for Trump? Hope for his recovery but the following acts show he is completely undeserving
Say no to undeserved politeness towards Trump, according to Anand Giridharadas on Chris Hayes. Both him and Neera Tanden on Lawrence O'Donnell civilly laid out the case to vote him out. He can convalesce on one … Read More
Julia Louis-Dreyfus & The Cast Of Veep Reunite To Help Joe Biden Win Wisconsin
Received this e-mail today from Emmy Award Winning Actress, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, on behalf of the Wisconsin Democratic Party: Friends, I’m so excited to announce a cast Reunion of VEEP to support … Read More
'Every species of boodle corrupt politics known in any campaign' now virtual front-porch campaigns
The Trump campaign goes virtual and now may attempt a national address to get more free media even after spreading the Trump virus at a fundraiser Thursday. Contact tracing may go … Read More
to whom does Trump owe money and did he use PPP funds to cover the vigorish
Trump has likely laundered vast sums, certainly has cheated on taxes and committed bank fraud, and is in hock to many entities who might take their repayments in the form … Read More
“…the biggest threat to the rule of law” is not 'organized, violent leftist terrorism', but Trump
Ryan Lizza tries to convince us that Trump is a formidable debater because horse race, even if Trump is a mudder. When the track gets wet, and his finances are below … Read More
