So yesterday, Geraldo Rivera, whose career has run the gamut from dreadfully embarrassing to off-the-charts mortifying, had a great idea. Let’s name the vaccine after Donald Trump, because, well … we want the baby-man to stop pouting.

The Hill:

Fox News correspondent-at-large Geraldo Rivera on Friday floated the idea of naming the COVID-19 vaccine “the Trump,” saying it could dampen the blow of President Trump's defeat in the presidential election.

Rivera said, “I had an idea … with the world so divided and everyone telling me 'He's gotta give up' and 'Time to leave' … why not name the vaccine 'the Trump'? You know make it like, 'Have you got your Trump yet?' ”

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I think Geraldo may be onto something — though, to me, a “Trump” would more likely be the shot of penicillin they stick in your ass to ward off syphilis. 

Also, if you want half the country to refuse their COVID shot, sure — name it after Trump.

Well, MSNBC’s Brian Williams also found the suggestion risible, and he responded with a DEFCON1 level of sarcasm: 

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GERALDO RIVERA: “But for [Trump] we’d still be waiting into the grim winter for these amazing, miraculous medical breakthroughs.”

WILLIAMS: “You know, for my money Geraldo raises a good point there. It’s possible we just don’t give the president enough credit for his FDR-like devotion to tackling this virus: his laser-like focus, his daily devotion, the sympathy he’s forever expressing to the families of the quarter million dead. Even the way the president lectures us in that way to please wear a mask and stop the spread. And he’s always advocated injections. Geraldo may be onto something. What Trump Steaks did for the hungry, what Trump Water did for the thirsty in our nation, what Trump University did to lift up the uneducated in our country — well, along comes Trump the Vaccine. The possibilities, I think you’ll agree, are endless.”

Yup.

If anything from the COVID era should be named after Trump, it should be losing one’s sense of taste. “Oh, damn, my taste is gone. I’ve been trumped. Suddenly I have an irresistible urge to cover the dog in gold leaf!” 

And we wouldn’t have had a vaccine if someone else had been president? Did Trump sequence the coronavirus’ genome while I wasn’t looking? What exactly did he do that any other president wouldn’t have done — other than signal to a country of 328 million vulnerable souls that masks are for loser nerds? 

“Have you got your Trump yet?”

Ugh.

Thankfully, no.

This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. The first history of the Trump Error is complete! Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump is hot off the presses! Along with Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump, Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump, you’ll see the Trump years from a hilarious new perspective. Click those links, yo!