Press "Enter" to skip to content

WH officials worried 'Salute to America' will be an inauguration-like flop: 'Heads are spinning'

How sad when the circus comes to town and nobody attends.

Sad, sad clowns all around.

White House officials are reportedly concerned that tomorrow’s Nuremberg Rally Salute to America event will turn out to be an embarrassment for the ocher arschloch, reminiscent of his inauguration, which was lightly attended compared to that of our nation’s real presidents.


Now, White House officials and allies are wringing their hands over the risk of the hastily arranged event morphing into Trump’s Inauguration 2.0, in which the size of the crowd and the ensuing media coverage do not meet the president’s own outsized expectations for the event.

“They started this too late and everyone has plans already,” said Dan Eberhart, a Republican donor and CEO of the drilling services company Canary, LLC. “Everyone will be there in spirit, but in reality, people planned their July 4th activities weeks ago.”

You mean they went into an event blind and unprepared, paving the way for a high-profile embarrassment and a black eye for the country and everyone in it? That doesn’t sound like the Trump administration I know!

“They are creating this thing from scratch, and I do not know if anyone knows how it will go off,” said another White House aide. “There are questions about the ticket distribution and who will show up. The weather might be bad. Heads are spinning.”

I really hope it does rain, because I want to see the Secret Service frantically jumping on Trump’s hair to shield it from moisture.

Even worse for Trump, this is apparently the easiest ticket in town to get — because (duh) planning for the event started so late everyone who’s anyone already had holiday plans.

Despite this:


You mean people didn’t hold the date, even though Trump promised fireworks on the Fourth of July? Crazy, man.

An informal survey of more than a half-dozen Trump donors and allies showed that none plan to attend. Several Republicans close to the White House returned POLITICO’s calls from beaches at least one plane ride away from Washington.

Maybe I will watch this travesty after all.

Is Trump still singeing your sphincter? Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its breathlessly awaited sequel Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the salve you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And you can get them for less than the price of a cup of coffee … or a black-market Xanax … or five minutes of therapy. It’s time to heal, my friends. Buy now!

Notify of

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

The Politicus is a collaborative political community that facilitates content creation directly on the site. Our goal is to make the political conversation accessible to everyone.

Any donations we receive will go into writer outreach. That could be advertising on Facebook, Twitter, and Reddit or person-to-person outreach on College campuses. Please help if you can:

Would love your thoughts, please comment.x