Trump's brain glitches as he tries to pronounce the name of one of America's greatest parks

The Keebler elf who remotely controls Trump from atop an enchanted toadstool is tripping balls again.

TRUMP: “When they gaze upon Yo-semites, Yosemenites, towering sequoias.”

Well, at least I have a new mantra in case “gate gate pāragate pārasamgate” doesn’t work out the way I’d hoped.

So, Donny, how is the “Joe Biden is shot; he’s so senile he doesn’t even know he’s alive” bit testing with undecided voters? Just a hunch, but I’m guessing Biden has heard of Yosemite National Park and doesn’t need to sound out its name like a second grader doing a report on a book he hasn’t read.

I’m not sure I can make it to January. Someone please show up with a giant butterfly net and take this weirdo away.

“This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. Find out what made dear Bette break up. Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are now available for a song! Click those links, yo!