I thought my embarrassment over Donald Trump being president had reached a state of supersaturation. But it turns out there’s plenty of room for more shock and shame.
According to a FAKE NEWS! Reuters story, the German newspaper Welt am Sonntag is reporting that Trump tried to convince the German company CureVac, which is working on a coronavirus vaccine, to come to the U.S. In fact, he “offered funds” to bring the firm to our shores. Germany’s Health Ministry has confirmed the report.
But that’s burying the lede. Like, big-league.
“The German government is very interested in ensuring that vaccines and active substances against the new coronavirus are also developed in Germany and Europe,” the newspaper quoted a Health Ministry official as saying. “In this regard, the government is in intensive exchange with the company CureVac.”
Welt am Sonntag quoted an unidentified German government source as saying Trump was trying to secure the scientists’ work exclusively, and would do anything to get a vaccine for the United States, “but only for the United States.”
There was no comment immediately available from the U.S. embassy in Berlin when contacted by Reuters on Sunday over the report, and nobody was available to comment at CureVac. Welt am Sonntag said CureVac declined to comment.
WHAT. THE. EVER. LIVING. FUCK?
Seriously? Is Trump hoping we’ll be the only ones left standing? Is he hoping to airlift bratwurst back to the U.S. when this is over so we can all have a jolly feast and celebrate our eternal hegemony?
This guy is a fucking monster.
Someone please, please, please put a sack over his head and throw him in the brig. Or at least invoke the 25th Amendment. Like, now.
Is Trump still chafing your arse-cheeks? Then Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Pr*sident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy.