Leave it to Donald Trump to find a silver lining that simply isn’t there.

During a COVID-19 briefing with airline CEOs yesterday, this bit of word-vomit disgorged from the tumescent noggin of our collective bath salts hallucination:

TRUMP: “In a certain way, you could say that the borders are automatically shut down, without having to say ‘shut down.’ I mean, they’re, to a certain extent, automatically shut down. But it’s affecting the airline business, as it would. And a lot of people are staying in our country, and they’re shopping and using our hotels in this country. So, from that standpoint, I think, probably, there’s a positive impact. But there’s also an impact on overseas travel, which will be fairly substantial.”



p class=”is-empty-p”>

No, there really isn’t a positive impact. 1) People are dying, so this is kind of an awful thing to say to begin with and, 2) people aren’t deciding between going to Tuscany or Dave & Buster’s. THEY’RE STAYING THE FUCK HOME, YOU PHOSPHORESCENT PHALLUS!

I know Trump wants to put a positive spin on this crisis as the stock market shrinks faster than his pupils during an Adderall embargo, but we kind of need an even-keeled approach from our leaders. This doesn’t help, dude.

Is Trump still chafing your arse-cheeks? Then Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy.

Notify of

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x