How ridiculous is this going to get? Will Donald Trump appoint a special task force to try to prove Alabama was in the path of Hurricane Dorian when Trump said it was?
Republicans, at some point you’re just going to have to admit that Donald Trump is not mentally well and never will be. I implore you to make that call before he takes a shit in his own hand at the 2020 Republican National Convention and declares it his running mate. (Then again, that would be an upgrade.)
Now Trump — extending this absurd Alabama hurricane story to the fifth day and counting — is trying to force Fox News reporters to cut their own colleagues off at the knees.
That’s not pants-wetting scary or anything. Nothing to see here, folks.
So yesterday, after finishing his 3 p.m. live shot, Fox News reporter John Roberts found himself summoned to the Holy of Holies in order to hear the actual president of the United States whine further about the Alabama Hurricane Affair — which is now a crisis of such grave and lasting import it gets the proper-noun treatment.
Roberts' analysis of the meeting was that the President was “just looking for acknowledgment that he was not wrong for saying that at some point, Alabama was at risk — even if the situation had changed by the time he issued the tweet” on Sunday morning, in which he said the state “will most likely be hit.” The President also provided Roberts with graphics to make his points.
Okay, that’s just standard, boilerplate DJT fucknuttery, but it gets worse — because Trump wanted Roberts to metaphorically (I assume it was only metaphorical) shiv his Fox News colleague Shepard Smith (the only really honest reporter at Fox) over Smith’s coverage of the story.
A White House aide familiar with the Oval Office meeting with Roberts said that Trump also voiced his displeasure about Fox News anchor Shepard Smith's skeptical reporting about the Alabama map.
The President summoned Roberts “to hit back at Shepard Smith,” the White House aide said.
Roberts claimed in his email that he pointed out to the President that by the time of his tweet warning Alabama and other states of the storm — 10:51 am ET on Sunday — Dorian's projected trajectory had moved much farther east and was no longer including any part of Alabama. The President “seemed to agree that the forecast track had moved — but he was adamant that at some point, Alabama was at risk,” Roberts wrote.
Uh huh. Well, that’s not really the point. The point is that the information he tweeted was false by the time he tweeted it and WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK? If Trump worked at Golden Corral they wouldn’t let him near the cutlery. Why the fuck does he have the nuclear codes?
Please, if we survive this presidency, can we change the Constitution to require a mental health screening for all prospective federal officeholders? It’s way past time.
Is Trump still chafing your arse-cheeks? Then Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its breathlessly awaited sequel Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy.
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