Trump suggests Paul Ryan is speaking out against him because he's been paid off

Donald Trump and Paul Ryan’s relationship has always been fraught. They were forced to work together for two years, but they couldn’t have been much different. Trump obviously had no idea what he was talking about on any subject, whereas Ryan was a celebrated policy wonk who also had no idea what he was talking about but had somehow convinced numerous members of the press that he did.

Plus, they hated each other — that much was clear.

And, of course, they still do, if the events of the past 24 hours are any indication.

Now, I don’t have much reason to take sides in this spat. As a native Wisconsinite who now resides on the West Coast, I’ve observed that pusillanimous poseur Ryan from up close and far away, and I’ve surmised that he’s a sociopath through and through. And Trump? Fuck that guy, in all ways but literal.

If both those assholes were drowning and I had room for only one of them on my lifeboat, I’d stretch out my legs and start merrily chumming the waters with fish heads.

But at least Paul Ryan has the self-control to conceal his contempt. Trump, on the other hand, is just a frothing blob of spittle and id.

And, hoo-boy, did the latest comments from Ryan set him off.

In Tim Alberta’s upcoming book American Carnage, Ryan says Trump was and is, well, an ignoramus:

“I told myself I gotta have a relationship with this guy to help him get his mind right. Because, I’m telling you, he didn’t know anything about government.”

Again, that couldn’t be more obvious. But Trump didn’t take it well, to say the least.

At the White House today, Trump responded with his favorite — and most transparently feckless — defense mechanism: projection. “Frankly, he was a baby, he didn’t know what he was doing,” said Trump.

Uh huh. Agreed, but Ryan at least knows how a bill becomes a law. I’d be willing to bet Trump still hasn’t fully grasped the process.

But more crazy was coming, because this is Trump, after all:

“For him to be going out and opening his mouth is pretty incredible. But maybe he gets paid.”

He gets paid? To make up embarrassing revelations about Donald J. Trump? Whose life so far has been nothing but one long uninterrupted string of embarrassing revelations?

Sure, Jan.

Maybe wean yourself off the Adderall a little at a time. Going cold turkey is pretty dangerous, really.

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  • July 12, 2019