Okay, Li’l Donny. Whatever you say.
Donald Trump caught various West Wing officials off-guard on Tuesday when he decided to describe the woman alleging that they’d had an affair as having a “horseface.” But privately, the president not only thought that it was strategically smart to go after the adult film star Stormy Daniels in such a visceral way; he workshopped the insult prior to tweeting it.
Well before Trump mocked Daniels’ physical appearance, he trial-ballooned the “horseface” dig privately—among White House aides, close friends, and acquaintances. One source close to Trump even recalled him saying in passing, “that fucking horseface.”
According to a White House official and two other sources who talk regularly to Trump, many people in his orbit had for months told the president it was best not to elevate Daniels by, for example, rage-tweeting about her. Trump, for his part, argued that hitting back publicly and “hard” at the porn actress would not only be right, but could prove politically advantageous.
Sure. Whatever. Don’t quit your day job.
Wait, what the fuck am I saying? DO quit your day job. Just don’t, you know, go into comedy or political consulting. You’d make a serviceable carny, I suppose. Or an excellent East River sludge barge.
I’ve worked jobs where the boss was a loon, and if he tried anything like this we’d do everything short of wrapping him head to toe in chloroform rags and FedEx’ing him to Papua New Guinea.
So almost as scary as having Donald Trump as pr*sident is having Donald Trump’s toadies running the West Wing.
YOUR ONLY JOB IS TO KEEP THIS RANCID COW PLOP FROM MAKING IDIOTIC DECISIONS! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DO IT!
Yo! Aldous J. Pennyfarthing’s new book, The Fierce, Fabulous (and Mostly Fictional) Adventures of Mike Ponce, America’s First Gay Vice President is now available at Amazon.
And don’t forget about Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump, which you can purchase here.