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Trump claims media Photoshopped alleged 'fake Melania' photos

2 min read

So there’s a silly conspiracy theory making the rounds that’s worthy of Alex Jones at a neighborhood bath salts-tasting party. According to this theory, Melania Trump isn’t really Melania Trump in several recent high-profile photos. She’s #FakeMelania. A body double.

Okay, then.

Hey, we know it has to be nearly impossible to stand next to Donald Trump for any length of time without spontaneously turning your skin inside out with revulsion, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t doing her duty as first lady, or whatever you want to call her. We’re all revolted by the guy, but why make up implausible stories that wouldn’t really matter that much even if they were true?

We all know this, right? It’s just one of those goofy rumors that gets spread around from time to time — like Obama was born in Kenya, or Donald Trump is a double amputee whose prosthetic legs are brimming over 24/7 with ham loaf and party dip.

So it’s best just to ignore it, right?

Oh, no. Not if you’re our perpetually aggrieved #FakePOTUS.

The Fake News photoshopped pictures of Melania, then propelled conspiracy theories that it’s actually not her by my side in Alabama and other places. They are only getting more deranged with time!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 13, 2019

The media did no such thing, you lunatic. Take your freebase kit outside before you burn down the White House. 

And, sure, why not take a conspiracy theory no one really took seriously until now and legitimize it in front of the entire world? My God, it is frighteningly easy to goad this guy into doing and saying stupid shit. Think our enemies haven’t noticed that?


Yo! Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing is now available at Amazon! Buy there (or at one of the other fine online retailers carrying it), or be square. And get ready for the SEQUEL, “Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump,” coming in April.


But wait, there’s more! The Fierce, Fabulous (and Mostly Fictional) Adventures of Mike Ponce, America’s First Gay Vice President is also available at Amazon! You can get two great political humor ebooks for less than the price of the coffee you’ll be spitting out on your tablet when you read them!

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