Please let this be my very last memory of Donald Trump’s 2020 campaign. They’re playing the fucking theme to Titanic, for fuck’s sake!

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Good night nurse.

Of course, Trump would have totally shown up in little boy’s shorts while clutching an oversized lollipop in order to get on one of those lifeboats. And he’d have almost certainly stepped on Barron’s head in the process. 

Bring me the Trump campaign’s rally-music guy. I want to either buy him a drink or laugh my ass off at him. Either way it would be the most fun I’ve had in years.

This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. Find out what made dear Bette break up. Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are now available for a song! Click those links, yo! 

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