Top Trump toady: 'President Trump today had a great day'

Erm … what?

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LOU DOBBS: “Good evening, everybody. President Trump today had a great day — a day that any president could only dream of. President Trump started off the day with a nomination for the Nobel Peace Prize. That nomination comes weeks after President Trump brokered an historic peace deal between Israel and the United Arab Emirates. It’s an achievement that has eluded every president, every administration since the founding of Israel in 1948. And a member of Norway’s parliament submitted the nomination and praised President Trump for his efforts to resolve conflicts worldwide.”

Uh huh.

A little context: The guy who nominated Trump, far right-wing Norwegian Parliament member Christian Tybring-Gjedde, last nominated Trump for the award in 2018 in recognition of Trump’s North Korea vaporware. And so far this year, 318 people or organizations have been nominated for the award. A nomination is meaningless. It’s like writing in Heinrich Himmler on your MLB All-Star fan ballot. It would be more impressive if Tybring-Gjedde had named a lutefisk sandwich after him at a popular Oslo deli.

So that part of Dobbs’ daily Trump-fluffery is clearly B.S.

As for “President Trump today had a great day — a day that any president could only dream of”? 



Uh … no.

— Santiago Mayer (@santiagomayer_) September 9, 2020

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This might sound like a silly question, but does Lou Dobbs watch the news? Or does he get all his information from White House press releases?

You see, there’s this virus, and Donald Trump was just caught on tape privately admitting that it was “deadly” and worse than the flu, and that he “wanted to always play it down.” And he admitted that while telling all of us it was nothing much to worry about, and …

Ah, fuck it.

Lou doesn’t care. As long as the photos of Dobbs snorting coke off a bonobo’s dick stay in the vault, everything will be just fine. (To be fair, I don’t know that Trump has such photos, but what other possible explanation is there?)

Good gourd, you won’t believe this. Two of Aldous J. Pennyfarthing’s books are now available for 99 cents apiece! Lasso copies of Dear Fcking Moron: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 Letters to Donald Trump for this comically low price (in one day the price goes up to $1.99). And, as always, you can get your copy of Dear F*cking Lunatic and preorder the final installment, Goodbye, Asshat.