Almost immediately after the siege on the Capitol ended, people started both-sidesing the event. You know, liberals didn’t care about the violence and property destruction that arose in the wake of the racial justice protests over the summer (erm, false), so why do we care about this?

In other words, the same people who nearly prolapsed their assholes into lunar module parachutes over Barack Obama’s tan suit but said neither diddly nor squat about Donald Trump’s consistently criminal and loutish behavior were accusing us of rank hypocrisy.

So forgive me if my first reaction to this mealy take was white-hot rage.

Needless to say, there were a few picayune differences between last summer’s racial justice protests and the Beer-Goggle Putsch that just concluded.

First of all, the racial justice protesters were responding to something that actually exists—systemic racism in law enforcement and elsewhere. Whereas the Kook Brothers Riot was predicated entirely on a self-serving lie.

Secondly, the violence that did occur over the summer was often precipitated by right-wingers.

Thirdly, Joe Biden—our current standard-bearer—consistently condemned all the violence and destruction associated with the protests. Also, when did you see Biden riling up a mob of Antifa activists with poisonous invective and lies just minutes before they went ape-shit and tried to overthrow the government?

Oh, and there happens to be a pretty big difference between the seat of the federal government and a Jamba Juice in Minneapolis. But that’s splitting hairs.

Finally, this, from Jesse Mechanic, a contributor to HuffPost, Mother Jones, and other outlets …

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MECHANIC: “What happened on Wednesday at the Capitol and the various protests for racial justice that have been occurring across the United States for years are both the result of centuries of systemic racial oppression, but the groups are just a little bit different. You see, one group has been protesting and also breaking some windows and destroying some things because the police have been killing Black people with impunity because of centuries of mistreatment, abuse, and racism because of white supremacy—while the other group is white supremacists.

“It doesn’t mean that they all rock pointed hoods. It means that they all want to maintain the current order of things, which keeps white people oppressively on top. One group is fighting to end systemic racial oppression; the other group is fighting to maintain it, to modernize it, right? Why do you think you saw so many Confederate flags outside of the Capitol. It’s because that is the legacy they’re trying to uphold. The fucking Confederacy! The people who fought a war to keep slavery. Those sweethearts. And we’ve seen this type of backlash before, with Reconstruction, with the civil rights era. This is what happens when aggrieved white people get riled up by a propagandist, every time.

“And Donald Trump did not invent racism, but he pushed it aggressively back into the mainstream. Over and over again he said things like, ‘They’re killing you. They’re replacing you. They’re destroying America.’ They, they, they. Us vs. them, that’s the whole damn thing. Twenty minutes before those people stormed the Capitol, Donald Trump in a ‘Save America’ rally down the block told them, quote, ‘If you do not fight like hell, you’re not going to have a country anymore.’ So what did they do? They fought like hell, they tried to overthrow their government, and five people got killed. Sounds like inciting a riot to me, but what do I know?

“And Donald Trump has been like this from the jump. This isn’t something new. He’s been like this since he was sued for housing discrimination, since he called for the Central Park Five kids to be executed before there was even a trial. So to all the Republicans who have just now jumped ship because they were so disturbed by what happened, I would like to, and I mean this sincerely, dropkick each and every one of you into the dying sun. You do not get to separate from this now; that’s not how this goes.

“You see, this is you. This is your party, your group, your leader, your standard-bearer. What happened the other day was an attempted white supremacist insurrection of the government of the United States, and it happened because the president is a white supremacist, a propagandist, and a liar. He’s a danger to the republic and everyone in it. He should be removed from office immediately, like right the fuck now.”

Thanks, Jesse. Can’t add much to that. 

Straight fire, yo.

This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. The first history of the Trump Error is complete! Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump is hot off the presses! Along with Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump, Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump, you’ll see the Trump years from a hilarious new perspective. Click those links, yo!

  • January 9, 2021