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The Mooch drags Trump *hard* in new interview: 'Oh my god, this jack*ss'

Okay, he’s a fraud and a loudmouth and a total douche-canoe frigate. I get that. But the enemy of my enemy is, well, still maybe my enemy — but definitely less of an enemy. And as evidenced by his recent comments in this new Vanity Fair interview, Anthony “The Mooch” Scaramucci has turned hard on Donald Trump … to say the least.

He’s like Leo DiCaprio in The Revenant, except with much, much tidier hair. And only his soul was mauled by a vicious animal before he was left for dead.

In a sit-down with Vanity Fair’s William D. Cohan, not only did Scaramucci sound marginally sane, he never once accused Cohan of auto-fellatio. Which was a nice departure for him.

A few choice excerpts:

He’s actually worse than a racist. He is so narcissistic, he doesn’t see people as people. He sees them as objects in his field of vision. And so therefore, that’s why he has no empathy. That’s why he’s got his thumb up in the air when he’s taking a picture with an orphan. That’s why when someone’s leaning over the desk and asks [Nobel Prize–winning human rights activist Nadia Murad], “Well, what happened to your family members?”—they were murdered—he just looks at her and says, “Okay, when are we getting coffee here?”

You know, he doesn’t look at people—and by the way, if you and I were in his field of vision and he had a cold and the two of us had to die for him to get a Kleenex, you’re fucking dead. I mean, there’s no chance. You understand that, right?

And he was just warming up:

I think the guy is losing it, mentally. He has declining mental faculties; he’s becoming more petulant; he’s becoming more impetuous. Okay, you see just by the way he’s sweating, his body’s not doing well. It’s obviously not a guy that takes care of himself, right? And he doesn’t listen to anybody. And just think about this, okay? There’s no one—there’s no Jim Mattis; there’s no Gary Cohn; there’s no one to check him anymore. Whatever my differences were with General John Kelly, after he left, this thing has completely unspooled.

And hey, I’m not a GOT guy, but I know a lot of you are. And we’ve all seen The Wizard of Oz, right?

You know, this is like Game of Thrones. We need an Arya Stark, okay? We gotta take this guy out because this is like the Night King. The minute the Night King is vaporized, all the zombies are gonna fall by the wayside, right? We had the Wicked Witch of the West, but he is the Wicked Witch of the West Wing. We gotta get some water thrown on him. He’ll start melting.

Preach it, Mooch. The fruit flies in the White House kitchen lasted longer than you did, but maybe you can be a bug up Trump’s ass for another year and a half. It’s the least you can do, right?

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P.S.: There’s a lot more at the link, including the phrase “Oh my god, this jackass.” It’s a fun read if you hate Trump as much as I — and I know you do.

Are you tired of the amoral shitgibbon? Then Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its breathlessly awaited sequel Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy. Buy now!

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