This appears to be the Presidents theory.

The FBI and Veterinarians across the land have been alerted to be on the lookout for one [or more] extremely constipated dog[s].

Hell, our psycho-kitty has a better excuse when sitting near to a recently shredded curtain, “It was the fly’s fault mam” and the evidence can be at least seen nearby.

“Rudy needed to tuck in his shirt and the wind blew away all the evidence.”

Either his lawyers should give up their day job or there is no evidence, probably both, what a  shambolic sackful of ideologs, any competent vaguely honest lawyers would have run away and hid by now.

What a shit show.

P.S I know he doesn’t own a dog, kinda the point.