Hiring TV talking head (er, ass) Larry Kudlow as an economic adviser, which Donald Trump (in)famously did, is kind of like hiring a pro bass fisherman to remove your appendix.
Correction: It’s like hiring a bad pro bass fisherman to remove your appendix. With a pair of salad tongs and an ice augur.
Kudlow is so consistently wrong about the economy — his area of supposed expertise — that it would be downright funny … if he weren’t currently one of a handful of ambulatory brain stems in charge of — erm, oh, here it is — the economy.
To cite just one of numerous examples of Kudlow’s feckless flapdoodle, here’s what he wrote in December 2007, just as the Great Recession was slipping on its Republican-ball-stompin’ boots:
“There’s no recession coming. The pessimistas were wrong. It’s not going to happen. At a bare minimum, we are looking at Goldilocks 2.0. (And that’s a minimum). Goldilocks is alive and well. The Bush boom is alive and well. It’s finishing up its sixth consecutive year with more to come. Yes, it’s still the greatest story never told.”
FYI, the Great Recession officially began in — erm, oh, here it is — December 2007.
So what is one to do with Kudlow’s proclamations when he drifts far outside his area of supposed expertise? Well, you should take them with a grain of potassium cyanide salt.
Remember when he said, back in February, that the U.S. had contained the coronavirus “pretty close to airtight”? Ha ha ha! Oh, that was a good one. (So why exactly do networks still interview this guy? Do they have some sort of interviewee exchange program with an alternate universe that I don’t know about?)
So what’s Kudlow’s latest methane-rich brain fart?
Well, it’s this.
He's an economics guy through and through [sic].
Which is why it's odd that, on Wednesday, Kudlow decided to offer his thoughts on whether he believes systemic racism still exists in America.
“I do not,” Kudlow told a group of reporters. “I will say it again. I do not.”
Yes, racism is contained, I won’t say airtight, but pretty close to airtight.
So what are all these protesters complaining about, then? They must be super deluded if they’re gainsaying the sage pronouncements of the eternally enlightened Larry Kudlow.
Incidentally, here’s what Kudlow said yesterday about the current economy.
“We still have a lot of hardship, and we have a lot of heartbreak in many areas. The numbers are still way too high on the unemployment and so forth,” Kudlow said on “The Exchange.” “But it looks like we’ve hit a turning point.”
Okay then. You know, I wish Larry Kudlow were a stock so I could short him. But, sadly, he’s still just director of the National Economic Council.
“This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. Find out what made dear Bette break up. Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Pr*sident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are now available for a song! Click those links, yo!