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Ted Cruz tried to explain science to AOC, but he inconveniently forgot he's dumb

2 min read

Oh, it’s like shooting transitional fish fossils in a barrel. 

First, Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez rightly pointed out that Mike Pence is to science as Donald Trump is to leafy green vegetables:

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Of course, Ted Cruz thought he had his boy’s back:

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Not sure exactly what he’s trying to get at here. It’s probably some transphobic slur. I don’t happen to speak fluent asshole. Anyway, it did not go as planned for Mr. Science:

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Just as Ted Cruz can't see a Tiktaalik fossil with both fish-like and tetrapod-like characteristics, he apparently can’t imagine a woman who uses science for something other than measuring out cake ingredients.

Don’t fret, Ted. Remember that God created aloe on the third day so you could soothe that wicked burn.

Is Trump still chafing your arse-cheeks? Then Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy.

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