Criminals aren’t always the brightest bulbs on the marquee, but even the least savvy of these fiends do what they can to cover their tracks. The ambulatory TruckNutz who planned the Jan. 6 Capitol coup, on the other hand? They’re like if Jeff Dahmer showed up at the church basement potluck...
BREAKING NEWS: Saruman’s orcs are having a hard time finding jobs in the new post-Mordor economy. Several Uruk-hai have applied for au pair positions in the Shire and been flatly refused. Who knows why? Might have something to do with their brazen attempt to overthrow Gondor, but it could be anything,...
On Jan. 6, Donald Trump took advantage of a phalanx of weak-minded sheep to do his bidding, sending them into the fray at the Capitol while he cooled his bone-spurred heels in the safety of his KFC-redolent villain’s lair. That’s not my assessment. Except for the KFC part, that’s basically...
Now that we’ve entered the “none of that really happened” phase of Donald Trump’s Bumblefuck Putsch, I guess indelible images like—oh, I don’t know—a fucking insurrectionist waving his Traitor Pride flag in the halls of the U.S. Capitol can scurry on down the memory hole, with all the other outrages from...
