Russian state TV weighs in on mushroom-penis-gate

Julia Davis is a Russia media analyst who monitors the country’s television broadcasts.

And it turns out she’s dug up morel disgusting shiitake for us to chew on.

Seems Russian state TV is skeptical about Stormy Daniels’ recent allegation that Trump’s toadstool is far too small to satisfy a woman or safely house Jeff Sessions. And, perhaps fearing that their Manchurian candidate could burst into a cloud of puffball spores at any moment, they’ve decided to question Daniels’ veracity.



Adult film star Stormy Daniels poses and signs autographs at Chi Chi Larue's adult entertainment store May 23, 2018 in West Hollywood, California. - Daniels, whose real name is Stephanie Clifford, earned international headlines for her legal battle with President Donald Trump over an alleged affair she claims the pair had a decade ago. West Hollywood Mayor John Duran proclaimed May 23, 2018 ``Stormy Daniels Day'', recognizing Clifford for "her leadership in the #RESIST movement.'' (Photo by Robyn Beck / AFP)        (Photo credit should read ROBYN BECK/AFP/Getty Images)
“Nobody knows the truffle I’ve seen …”

Okay, I’ve heard quite enough now.

Please pass the death caps. And mush.


Yo! Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing is now available at Amazon! Buy there (or at one of the other fine online retailers carrying it), or be square.