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Rudy's Pettysburg address went exactly as you'd expect

4 min read

I took a break from watching Rudy: The Rudy Giuliani Story just now to check out some of Mayor NutFiddles’ “hearing” in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania.

The world will little note nor long remember what Rudy said there today, but that doesn’t mean we can’t all have a good larf over it right effing now.

Luckily, White House correspondent Andrew Feinberg cut it up into tiny pieces for easy consumption, and I was able to limit my beleaguered eyeballs’ exposure to this psychedelic circus.

Here’s Feinberg …

Oh, and here’s the part where Donald Trump chimed in!

Well, at least Rudes didn’t look like a diseased maple tree getting tapped for sticky hell-syrup this time.

Of course, they might as well have held this “hearing” in a dive bar in Manitowoc, Wisconsin, because that’s the level of discourse here. The only thing missing is an addled adipose sack snarfing a veritable Olympic swimming pool full of fried cheese curds while shouting about the refs fucking over the Packers.

Why do I get the feeling the “other half” of the country is never going to let this go? Like, ever.

By the way, here’s a fun clip from that Rudy movie I was talking about …

Somehow I’m having a hard time picturing Rudy as a “romantic,” but then right-wingers (James Woods included) see things that I’m simply incapable of seeing. Less power to them, eh?

This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. The first history of the Trump Error is complete! Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump is hot off the presses! Along with Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump, Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump, you’ll see the Trump years from a hilarious new perspective. Click those links, yo!

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