Last updated on January 7, 2021
I’m not really worried that this passel of dyspeptic donkey brains will actually succeed in overturning our free and fair election. Donald Trump can scarcely complete a poo attempt, much less a coup attempt, so the future of our republic seems secure for at least the next four years.
And to some degree all this is amusing. Except for all the times it’s not—which is pretty much always, come to think of it.
But it’s important to point out just how feckless and stupid this effort has been, because it’s playing extremely well with all the dipshit dead-enders it’s supposed to play well with, and it falls to us to be the reasonable voices in the room.
So Louisiana Rep. Clay Higgins, one of the traitorous shit-for-brains (should the plural be “shits-for-brains”? My AP stylebook gives me no guidance) attempting to pretend to overturn the election results, joined Jim Sciutto on CNN this morning, and this happened:
SCIUTTO: “What evidence do you have that the Justice Department does not?”
HIGGINS: “Well, I have, listen, we have a preponderance of evidence that election crimes may have been committed in six of the sovereign states …
SCIUTTO: “What evidence? Give me one example. Give me one example.”
HIGGINS: “Georgia changed the statutory requirements for viewing signatures, Pennsylvania eliminated signature requirements …
SCIUTTO: “That’s not true, the Georgia election official [Gabriel] Sterling rejected that very [crosstalk] he rejected it point by point yesterday, so I’m asking what evidence you have to contradict the state Republican election official there as you’re claiming right now. What evidence do you have?”
HIGGINS: “Good sir, I say again, we have a preponderance of evidence that crimes may have been committed, election crimes. The threshold for investigation is reasonable suspicion …
SCIUTTO: “Cite the evidence. Cite one example.”
HIGGINS: “I’ve just cited several. You’re being rather combative. I do believe you invited me on your show.”
SCIUTTO: “I did, but if someone makes a false claim on my show, I will contradict it.”
HIGGINS: “I have in my office, right now, hundreds and hundreds of pages citing evidence that crimes may have been committed.”
SCIUTTO: “Give me one example.”
HIGGINS: “I’m an investigator. I’ve already given you several. You’re just repeating your talking points.”
SCIUTTO: “I’m not. You said there was a problem verifying signatures. That was contradicted yesterday in a press conference in Georgia by Mr. Sterling and, for instance, on verifying signatures. They, in fact, examined more than 15,000 mail-in ballot envelopes, only found two with signature issues. So I’ve contradicted that one, give me another …
HIGGINS: “Well I say again, that’s a talking point.”
Oh, yes, God forbid people just repeat talking points over and over without backing them up.
In the second clip, Sciutto attempts to press Higgins on whether Trump’s treasonous call to Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger should be investigated. Higgins dodges that, claims that the media are taking just a few minutes of the call out of context to make Trump (“a candid speaker,” according to Higgins, as if that somehow matters) look bad. Sciutto notes that he listened to the entire call, which, honestly is a lot worse than the clip The Washington Post initially released. Then Higgins attacks Raffensperger for taping the conversation, because that’s definitely the worst part about that call.
Higgins then invites Sciutto to his office to review his “hundreds of pages of evidence.” Of course, they invented the fax machine a long time ago, and some people even have email now, so I’m not sure what Higgins is going on about there. Maybe he just wants to show Sciutto his Don Jr. bobblehead.
Then Higgins gets even huffier as Sciutto points out that all his “evidence” has been rejected by Republican state officials in Georgia.
But Higgins didn’t come on CNN to give evidence. He came to spread rumors, innuendoes, and conspiracy theories. Like all of them do.
And so that’s what he did.
This shameful kabuki theater will go on and on, unfortunately, and brain-dead cowards like Higgins will carry that torch for years. Because they have no minds of their own now. They’ve been eaten by Donald Trump.
This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. The first history of the Trump Error is complete! Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump is hot off the presses! Along with Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump, Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump, you’ll see the Trump years from a hilarious new perspective. Click those links, yo!
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