Republican congressman claims corporations standing up for voting rights is 'fascism'

Wait, I’m confused. I thought we lived in a free-market democracy in which corporations are “people” with sacrosanct “opinions” (which, for some reason, usually come in the form of gobs and gobs of campaign cash).

So when corporations literally write their own legislation, it’s A-okay. That’s just what the Founding Fathers envisioned as they grew hemp and curated their expansive STD collections.

But if a corporation—for once—stands up for voting rights instead of endorsing a coal lobbyist as head of the EPA, now you’re talking Italy circa 1943.

And if insurance companies use their clout (i.e., money and influence) with members of Congress to prevent meaningful action on universal health care—you know, the system everyone else in the developed world has—again, that’s as God intended. But if they want to promote inclusive hiring or, I don’t know, oppose Jim Crow 2.0, suddenly it’s an undemocratic overreach.