Point and laugh at these conservatives and their stupid 2018 predictions

Politico has a fun bit of schadenfreude-fluff on its website today.

It’s a retrospective of the shittiest political predictions from 2018.

Now, everyone screws up badly from time to time when it comes to predicting the future. I predicted the Packers would win the Super Bowl this year (as I do pretty much every year) … and I just assumed Steve Bannon would finally burst into fungal spores and scatter his noisome DNA throughout the observable universe.

Neither came to pass.

Of course, some predictions are more preposterous than others. And conservatives can lay claim to the majority of the really dumb prognostications. Because, you know, in TrumpWorld Mueller’s investigation is a big hoax that will never produce anything but very expensive confetti. And all those “real Americans” were going to give Trump and the GOP a big victory in the 2018 midterms.

Since I don’t feel any impulse to embarrass anyone but conservatives, then, I’ve culled the worst 2018 predictions from right-leaners and right-fallen-overs.

If you want to see all 20 bad predictions, click here.

John Kelly will root out and “publicly humiliate” the author of the anonymous New York Times op-ed within days of its release.
Made by: Sebastian Gorka

Mueller will end his probe before the midterm elections and declare Trump “innocent.”
Made by: Bill Mitchell

The Mueller investigation will “be put to rest” and “no significant charges will be leveled against anyone.”
Made by: Glenn Beck

Mueller’s investigation will end by September.
Made by: Rudy Giuliani

The New York Times would be proven wrong in reporting that Trump tried to fire Mueller.
Made by: Sean Hannity

Trump will “ramp up construction” of the wall and reauthorize DACA.
Made by: Siraj Hashmi, Washington Examiner

“The great political surprise of 2018 will be the size of the Republican victory.”
Made by: Newt Gingrich, Fox News

More black Americans will be “on the Trump Train” at the end of 2018.
Made by: Diamond & Silk

“Our economic news is only going to get brighter in 2018.”
Made by: Laura Ingraham, Fox News

And, of course, the Idiot of the Year Award goes to …

A “RED WAVE!” would crash over the 2018 elections.
Made by: Donald Trump

I don’t dare make predictions for 2019, because I don’t want to look like a fool. But I’ll make one exception: Republicans will continue to ride the moron train in 2019. And it will be a sight to behold.

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Yo! Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing is now available at Amazon! Buy there (or at one of the other fine online retailers carrying it), or be square.

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