Oh noz! Ryan Zinke has contracted the dreaded “logic amnesia” from his boss!

Just a quick click-n-fo. Ryan Zinke, the underwhelming Secretary of the Interior, has had a case referred by the Inspector General of his department to the FBI for criminal investigation. The funny thing is that we have no way of knowing what the IG wants the FBI to investigate, since there are at least 4 open investigations into Zinke’s ethics, or lack thereof.

Whether it’s using a rich shitpokes private jet for a junket to Vegas to address the crony’s hockey team, getting a mom and pop bodega electric company the job of restoring power to Puerto Rico, or denying an Indian reservation a permit to open a casino that would compete against a MGM casino in a neighboring state, the possibilities are endless. But Zinke really needs to get his head into the game.

Zinke’s response has been as uninspiring as it is predictable. Basically it comes down to “I din’t do nuffin,” along with complaining that the whole investigation is just another “politically motivated witch hunt.” For a guy who was crafty enough to con enough suckers to send him to congress, you would think that Zinke would see the two football field sized holes in his excuse.

First of all, while the Department of the Interior may be his own, personal hack political playpen, the Inspector General of the department, just as with every other governmental department, is apolitical. They even have their own association, to self police, and talk over better ways to be fair and impartial. The fact that Zinke knows this is obvious by the fact that he recently sought to get rid of the IG, and replace her with the Trombie who tried to get Ben Carson off the hook for his extravagant dining room set spending.

But more importantly, Zinke seems to have a problem with realizing which side he’s on. He’s bleating like one of those black sheep about this being a politically motivated hit job on him. OK Ryan, you’re going to have to explain this one to me, I kinda got lost in the weeds on this one.

Last time I checked, you’re a Republican, right? Likewise, Trump also puts on a GOP jacket every day, just so long as it’s trimmed in gilt. And the congressional committees charged with oversight of your personal fiefdom are GOP dominated, am I getting that right? And a quick Google search showed me that the current Attorney General is Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III, a Republican, and a Trump appointee, just like yourself. Have I got it straight so far?

Then lease explain to me how in the fuck this can possibly be a politically motivated witch hunt, when the Inspector General is non partisan, and all of the other guardrails against your excesses are covered in nice, soft, comfy pillows?

I’m beginning to think that Ryan Zinke is having such a temper tantrum over this referral simply because, just like his sidekick Scott Pruitt, he has been so profligate in his excesses that even Trump himself won’t be able to save Zinke once the facts start to come out in the media.But keep your chin up Zinc. It’s always darkest just before the dawn. One down, only three more to go. Do far at least.

The wait is over! Volume two of the trilogy, President Evil II: A Clodwork Orange is now available. Amazon is whining about me crashing their site, but the hell with them, I ain't in this for their health. You can also find volume one, President Evil as well. And fear not, work on volume three is just beginning.

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