This Matt Gaetz scandal is probably a good thing for our country. If his head got any bigger, it might rip a hole in space-time.
As it is, things appear to be getting worse and worse for the flesh-toned Tootsie Pop.
He should probably be scrubbing his Twitter account in light of today’s revelation that he’s under investigation for an alleged sex-trafficking incident involving an underage girl, but if he is, he’s obviously not using the right search terms, because this tweet is still available:
I say we change Florida’s welcome signs to this 👇 https://t.co/w1eBUvvg8F
— Matt Gaetz (@mattgaetz) August 12, 2019
Here’s a screengrab in case he does get around to pulling it down after clumsily trying to explain why he’s standing naked in Chris Hansen’s kitchen with a six-pack of Mike’s Hard Lemonade:
Uh, not the best optics there, Matt. Well, at least you weren’t the lone member of Congress to vote against a sex trafficking bi …
P.S.: I kind of wanted to make the headline for this post “Big Head Clod Is a Monster,” but I wasn’t sure everyone would get the reference.
”This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on author Aldous J. Pennyfarthing via Twitter. Need a thorough Trump cleanse? Thanks to Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, Dear Fcking Lunatic, Dear Prsident A**clown and Dear F*cking Moron, you can purge the Trump years from your soul sans the existential dread. Only laughs from here on out. Click those links, yo!
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