NRA tweets vid of GOP senator cleaning gun to something that sounds like 'Boogie Nights' soundtrack

If I had to watch this, you do, too.

Louisiana Sen. John Kennedy, who sounds like Mr. Haney and looks like Arnold Ziffel, shot a video that made the NRA—which is dissolving faster than an Adderall suppository in the pulpy crevasses of Donald John Trump’s bottomless backside—bray about “triggering” the libs.

All this triggered was my gag reflex, but nice try, slowly dying husk of a once-formidable lobbying juggernaut.

Grab your air-sickness bags, unless you happen to like this sort of thing:

KENNEDY: “Folks, I believe that love is the answer, but you oughta own a handgun just in case.”

A few quick observations …

1) “Believe” isn’t spelled like that.


2) Are we really supposed to think this guy is a brave, stalwart American because he purchased a widely available item and rubbed it with a dishrag? It would be exactly as manly if I bought a Pez dispenser and taped myself eating Pez from it. These are easy videos to film. I don’t quite get what they’re supposed to prove, though.

3) What’s with the Boogie Nights pool party music? This guy doesn’t need any help making himself appear more sketchy.

Anyway, somehow I got through that whole video without being “triggered.” Better luck next time, NRA. Assuming there is a next time, that is.

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  • May 25, 2021
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