Now you can get a Trump-signed Bible for just $525 … and all your dignity

Yup, this is what the end of the world looks like. It’s not enough that the most slovenly, squalid, spiteful sinner on God’s green Earth was desecrating Bibles last week. Now you can get a Trump-despoiled holy book of your own for just … $525. On eBay!

Because this is what America is now. A place where the sacred and the profane can be easily purchased in one convenient package like a McDLT.

(According to the listing, this Bible was signed in 2016. I guess the seller figured he or she needed to seize the news cycle and cash out ASAP.)

And just in case you actually want to buy it, here’s the link. Knock yourself out.

No, really. If you’re actually thinking about buying it, I want you to literally knock yourself out. Chloroform works, but in this case a Wile E. Coyote anvil would be my preference.

Thank you.

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Yo! Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing is now available at Amazon! Buy there (or at one of the other fine online retailers carrying it), or be square. And get ready for the SEQUEL, “Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump,” coming in April.

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But wait, there’s more! The Fierce, Fabulous (and Mostly Fictional) Adventures of Mike Ponce, America’s First Gay Vice President is also available at Amazon! You can get two great political humor ebooks for less than the price of the coffee you’ll be spitting out on your tablet when you read them!