Nebraska's GOP governor: 'If you legalize marijuana, you’re gonna kill your kids'

Believe me, if it were possible to fatally overdose on marijuana, I’d be a heapin’ midden of THC-infused mulch right now. But it’s just not. In fact, the number of recorded cases of fatal cannabis overdose in the history of cannabis and overdoses is—oh, would you look at that?—still zero. 

I’m not saying it isn’t possible to get a bit too high from time to time. It definitely is. And maybe you’ll think you’re going to die, but you won’t—unless Neil Patrick Harris murders you on your way to White Castle, which I’m not totally ruling out. 

But even the DEA, which is basically a bad ‘80s Afterschool Special with a $3 billion budget, admits that “no deaths from overdose of marijuana have been reported.” Like, ever.

But don’t worry about facts. After all, Nebraska Gov. Pete Ricketts has a lot of strong opinions. Last week, during a spectacularly benighted press conference, he made them known.