Ivanka scolds media for ignoring 'left-wing' violence as Trump supporters chant 'break out Kyle'

The Trump family is to irony as Lennie from Of Mice and Men is to puppies. They’ve killed it more often than Donald Trump’s masturbating-hyena voice has killed my will to live.

And this morning, Ivanka Trump — the “smart” one — drove yet another stake into the heart of consensus reality:

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Oh, and she got an assist from Texas Rep. Dan Crenshaw:

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— Dan Crenshaw (@DanCrenshawTX) November 14, 2020

Uh huh. Remember Kyle Rittenhouse, dorkuses? He (allegedly) killed two protesters in Kenosha, Wisconsin, for … some reason. Remember James Alex Fields, one of those “very fine people” who just happened to murder Heather Heyer with his car during the Charlottesville protests?

Yeah, just imagine the outrage if peaceful liberal protesters were targeted with violence. No doubt the president of the United States would be livid — if he weren’t a lawless ghoul, that is.

In fact, far from there being “indignation,” Rittenhouse is now a hero among the truculent Trumpies:

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— Andy Campbell (@AndyBCampbell) November 14, 2020

Yes, imagine if the right wing were engaging in violence. IMAGINE!

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— Tariq Nasheed 🇺🇸 (@tariqnasheed) November 15, 2020

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You’d think conservatives would run as fast and as far away from Kyle Rittenhouse as possible. I mean, the guy took an AR-15 rifle to a protest he had no reason to be at and shot three people, killing two. The actual president of the United States attempted a mealy defense of him in the fucking White House briefing room. He defended this guy. This could not be more frightening.

Of course, Ivanka has her marching orders, and she knows what kind of people animate “the movement.” And they don’t have summer homes in the Hamptons, that much is certain. 

Soon, the Trump family will be off hatching schemes for their next assault on our senses. And whether or not Donald tries to make a comeback in 2024, the hatred and division he’s wrought will be with us for some time. 

This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. The first history of the Trump error is complete! Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump is hot off the presses! Along with Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump, Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump, you’ll see the Trump years from a hilarious new perspective. Click those links, yo!