Instead of fighting COVID or Russia, Trump spends his time brainstorming new nicknames for Biden

In a recent story about Donald Trump’s desperate attempts to smother his dumpster fire of a campaign with the same old clown shoes, The Washington Post notes that Trump isn’t 100 percent satisfied with his chosen nickname for Joe Biden.

You may have noticed Trump trying out “Corrupt Joe” lately in place of the long-established “Sleepy Joe,” and it turns out he’s had actual discussions about this with members of his campaign.

How many Americans died of COVID-19 while he was brainstorming puerile nicknames is unknown, but suffice to say Crooked Donny has plenty of blood on his hands already.

An urgent task for Trump and his team, advisers say, is to find a way to negatively define Biden — transforming the election into a choice between the two men, rather than a referendum on the president.
Trump has recently been asking advisers whether he should stick with his current nickname for Biden — “Sleepy Joe” — or try to coin another moniker, such as “Swampy Joe” or “Creepy Joe.” The president is not convinced that “Sleepy Joe” is particularly damaging, and some of his advisers agree and have urged him to stop using the nickname. In a tweet on Sunday, Trump tried out yet another variant: “Corrupt Joe.”

Having already given up on the quaint and old-fashioned “do your job competently” reelection strategy, Trump is going right back to the “lie, belittle, and defame” well. 

While he’s at it, maybe he can update his sloganeering, too. “Keep America Great” seems stale and derivative. I prefer “Trump 2020: What Doesn’t Kill You Will Kill You Next Term.”

Of course, what Trump is currently doing clearly isn’t working. Then again, he’s always been a one-trick pony. And that pony just happens to be a huge fucking racist.

Trump has responded to the turmoil by emphasizing his nativist and base instincts, attempting to rally his core supporters through controversial comments and tweets.
The latest example came Sunday, when Trump retweeted a video that included a supporter proclaiming “white power” in response to counterprotesters and calling his backers in the Florida retirement community where the demonstration occurred “great people.” Trump later deleted the tweet, and a White House spokesman said the president had not heard the “white power” shout.

Uh huh.

Needless to say, doubling down on racism in the middle of a worldwide racial awakening and a pandemic that’s disproportionately affecting people of color may not be a winning strategy.

“If the election was today, we are in big trouble,” according to one person close to Trump, who like others spoke on the condition of anonymity to share a candid assessment. “Thankfully, it is not.”

I guess they’re still counting on Donald Trump becoming “presidential.”

Granted, there are four months to go, and I suppose anything’s possible. It’s also possible that I’ll grow moose antlers and start shitting platinum ingots once a fortnight. But don’t hold your breath.


This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. Find out what made dear Bette break up. Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are now available for a song! Click those links, yo!

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