As I write this, blurry-eyed and still a bit nervous, things are looking much better for Joe Biden. But last night felt like watching an oncologist diligently search my chest X-ray for tumors. For eight hours. “Yeah, you might have a tumor here, or here, or here. Too early to call. Just for the sake of argument, let’s see how your chances of dying a painful, choking death change if we give NE-2 to Joe Biden.”
I didn’t eat. My dinner was two local Oregon IPAs and some weed.
I couldn’t sleep — eventually nodding off just after the big Milwaukee ballot dump put Biden ahead in my erstwhile home state of Wisconsin. (I may have to pull each and every one of those fuckers aside and ask, “What the fuck?”)
Of course, for weeks before last night I obsessively refreshed FiveThirtyEight and The Economist election model like a lab monkey jonesing for cocaine pellets.
It’s not healthy. Stop, Aldous! Stop! But I (we all) care so much about our friends, family, neighbors, and country that we get a wee bit obsessed.
We’re in a holding pattern now, but it looks like we’re going to land safely.
So what’s the point of this post? I guess moments like this are the time to reach out and tell the people you care about that you, well, care about them. And that’s true of this community. Though I haven’t met any of you in person (yet), I feel like I belong here. And to a guy who was born and raised in a small (now-conservative) town and has pretty much felt like an outsider his entire life, that’s pretty fucking cool.
We’ll get through this. I would have survived this all regardless, but it’s sure nice to have a community to lean on that can share my joy and pain.
This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. Find out what made dear Bette break up. Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are now available for a song! Click those links, yo!