I never want to hear the words I heard this morning to awaken me…EVER AGAIN.

Yesterday I was so depressed.  Could not figure out why.  Vet came and sat out on the patio and said, “You know, I am depressed really bad”.  I shook my head and said, “Not a good sign you know if we both are”.  

I felt like a cloud was hanging over us.  A deep dark cloud.  I chalked it up to it being the anniversary of my Daddy dying from Alzheimers in 2013.  ( You never get used to losing your Daddy or Mama),

My Daddy loved his grandkids.  He loved them so much he took custody before we got involved and got custody and finished raising them.   He was a pretty old fellow but had the patience of Job.   All but the least one which we have raised since birth practically and adopted all 4, are grown.   Well Daddy spoiled them so  that he would just put real little ducklings in their bathtub with their bathing suits on  and then carefully put the ducklings back in the pond when the oldest, Brandy was a toddler.   They loved Daddy who was known by everyone as Grandaddy.

Many years passed.  Brandy came down with juvenile diabetes.  She rebelled against that horrid disease and by the time she was a teenager and many trips to the hospital after getting married…..she got hooked on many drugs.   I had her in a rehab hospital when she was 16 and she was off the drugs but then after 18 she got back into them.

I lost my grandson to suicide in 2015 and Brandy’s half brother biologically.  You would have thought the birth of her daughter and her half brother’s death would have slowed down the drug use.  After her three hospitalizations for high blood sugar this past month she decided to try to quit… 

She left the area she was living in.   She called her biological uncle and moved in.  She kept in touch with us a lot but moreso the past two weeks.   She stayed in Georgia when we moved to Florida.  

I was awakened this morning to two words. “Brandy’s dead”.   I am still shaking and beside myself but you are my friends and I wanted you to know.   The oldest of adopted kids/grandkids went to sleep last night and never woke up.

I believe if my Daddy had to fight all the angels in Heaven, if possible, he stepped down and took her home and said, “ Let’s go Home, Brandy”.  I have to believe that mourning two deaths on the same day.

Light a candle and pray for me and this family  if you are a believer.

The bio Mom and me are still trying to figure out when in May to have a celebration of life, or where.  We are so hurting today.

I never ever want to hear “One of the kid’s is dead again”  It just isn’t natural to work that way.  She is the one that got to meet John Lewis and he adored her.

Love ya’ll.

  • April 17, 2021