If you said “turning someone else into a sucker,” you’re a winner. Come pick up your complimentary case of Zima and two Alvin Styczynski tickets.
While strolling around the lavish ambassador’s residence in Paris, he reportedly took a fancy to a number of pieces of artwork, including a bust of Benjamin Franklin and some Greek mythical figurines. So he ordered them removed from the residence and packed into Air Force One and brought to the White House, according to Bloomberg. White House spokesman Judd Deere confirmed the poaching, telling Bloomberg, “The president brought these beautiful, historical pieces, which belong to the American people, back to the United States to be prominently displayed in the People’s House.” The ambassador, Jamie McCourt, was surprised but didn’t interfere after Trump reportedly told him they would get their art back “in about six years.”
That’s it, though? I mean, Trump has permanently raised the bar for what passes as an outrage. I can only assume we’ll find out he sold this stuff on eBay or somehow got syphilis from the Ben Franklin bust.
Yes, stealing art does sound more fun than visiting a grody old cemetery full of dorkwads and nerds who didn’t have the savvy and street smarts not to get shot in the head.
Say, as long as we’re doing this art exchange program, maybe France wants the Statue of Liberty back. It’s not like we’re using it.
“This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.” — Bette Midler on Aldous J. Pennyfarthing, via Twitter. Find out what made dear Bette break up. Dear Fcking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Prsident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are now available for a song! Click those links, yo!