If I were a betting man, I’d wager that Matt Gaetz’s head is filled with equal parts brain matter, nougat, Nickelodeon slime, and unidentified ooze.

I’d bet my 2004 Pontiac Vibe on it. And my entire McLaughlin Group Pog collection.

So you might want to put on your 2017 solar eclipse glasses before reading this. It’s gross.

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