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GOP senator: We can't ban assault weapons because they're popular

2 min read

Sen. Pat Toomey sang the usual Republican hosannas to assault weapons during an appearance on Fox News today.

The gist: They’re “extremely popular,” so we can’t ban them.

Here’s the nuttery in all its glory:

FOX NEWS’ SANDRA SMITH: The shooter in Dayton had over 240 rounds at his disposal when he was shot and killed; he had the capacity to kill many more. Are you making any calls or recommendations on changing laws pertaining to that?

TOOMEY: So, my focus is on keeping guns out of the hands of people who should not have guns, people who have no legal right to a firearm. You know, guns that are described as assault weapons are almost invariably no more powerful than ordinary hunting rifles. They look different. They’re painted black and they’ve got features that an ordinary hunting rifle doesn’t have, but they’re no more lethal and …

FOX: What about magazine size?

TOOMEY: … and they’re extremely popular, and so to ban an extremely popular firearm, I’m not going to support that. That would be an infringement on the rights of law-abiding citizens.

You know, I remember having a great time whipping Jarts at my brother while looped to the gills on bath salts. I laughed so hard I squirted unpasteurized black market milk out of my nose. But I’ll never be able to relive that day because all those things were banned, despite their popularity.

Yes, these are illegal because a kid got killed once. Think about that.

You know, violent video games are pretty darn popular. And weed. And heroin, for that matter. And pissing on the future gravesite of Mitch McConnell so there’s a healthy urine aquifer in place to drop his royal sarcophagus in.

All those things are super popular. 

So maybe you want to change your bullshit answer, Sen. Toomey?

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