At some point we have to start checking their basements for pods, right? Can they really be this empty and soulless?

Republicans who were once on the right side of history have sworn fealty — in droves — over the past four years to the least admirable man on the planet. I sincerely hope we’re witnessing the unraveling of a political party and not an entire country.


Claire Chase, who is running to defeat Democratic Rep. Xochitl Torres Small in New Mexico's 2nd Congressional District, was outed as a “Never Trump” Republican Party member during the 2016 presidential election. Right-wing website Breitbart News first reported on Chase's anti-Trump past despite her current candidacy portraying herself as an ardent supporter of the Trump administration. Facebook posts dating back to 2015 see her ridiculing Trump as a Vietnam War draft-dodger and threatening to vote for Libertarian candidate Gary Johnson should Trump win the GOP primary.

A representative for Chase's U.S. House campaign now insists that she voted for Trump in November 2016 despite ridiculing him for at least two years. Her post-election comments continued to deride Donald Trump on a personal level — but now she has “come around.”

What made you come around, Claire? The kids in cages? The continual flouting of the rule of law? The venom? The chaos? The unhinged racism? The incitements to violence? The Twitter fights? The Dadaistic speeches? The 24/7 methane leak from his wee reptilian brain?


Oh, I know! Political cowardice!

“For all my friends who like Donald Trump, I'm working on a fuller rant than he's an a**hole unworthy of the office and the power of the President of THE United States,” Chase wrote on Facebook on August 30, 2015, as the New York businessman and reality TV host began surging against his GOP primary rivals.

So what, exactly, has Donald Trump done in the past four years to prove he’s no longer an asshole? Was it siding with Nazis? Endorsing a pedophile? Calling a sitting senator “Pocahontas”? Telling native-born congresswomen to go back to their “own countries”?

This is baffling. Or maybe not, when you come to realize political courage is the rarest of exceptions among members of the dotty personality cult that used to be the GOP.

Chase had other choice words, of course. You know, back in the day — when things still apparently mattered. From September 2015, after Trump said “[I] always felt that I was in the military.”

“Ugh. I *REALLY* dislike Donald Trump. I also went to military boarding school. Can I march in a military formation. Sure. Do I know what rank someone is by what's on their uniform? Yes. Can I recite the military alphabet. Yep. Did I go overseas and fight terrorists and watch friends get injured or die? Nope. Did I make huge sacrifices to defend this country from her enemies? No. Have I put my life on the line for almost less than minimum wage? I haven't. Why? Because I'm not in the goshdamn military. That's why. This is beyond offensive.”

And here she is today, fluffing up the marshmallow monstrosity:


Enjoy the campaign, Claire. Hope it’s worth losing your soul over. Assuming you ever had one.

Is Trump still chafing your arse-cheeks? Then Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its breathlessly awaited sequel Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy.

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