It’s hard to imagine what else Donald Trump could do to make himself look guilty. Maybe streak down Pennsylvania Avenue wearing nothing but an authentic Russian Army ushanka cap and an enormous red ball gag, while trailing a leather leash with “Putin’s bitch” meticulously inscribed on it in pink cubic zirconia? 

Because, damn, the dude sure doesn’t act like an innocent man.

Exhibit No. — well, sheesh, I’ve lost track: His krazy-eyez lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, is now telling us that Trump’s band of outlaws may try to hide the dump trucks full of dirt Robert Mueller is busy digging up as we speak.

From The Hill:

President Trump's attorney Rudy Giuliani is claiming that the president's legal team may invoke executive privilege to stop special counsel Robert Mueller's final report on the Russia investigation from being released to the public.

Giuliani told The New Yorker that it's likely the Trump administration would object to the memo being made public information.

“I’m sure we will,” he said, before adding that Trump would make the final call on a decision like that.

Trump will make the final call? Gee, I wonder what he’ll decide.

Giuliani made the comments in reference to the impending report that Mueller will file to Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein at the conclusion of his investigation into Russian election interference.

The New Yorker notes that Rosenstein will then have the ability to release the report to Congress and the public. But Giuliani has signaled that the president may move to stop that from happening — a development that could lead to a battle over whether Rosenstein is allowed to disclose the report.

Giuliani told The New Yorker that Trump's original legal counsel struck a deal with the special counsel reserving the White House the right to object to the public disclosure of information covered by executive privilege.

He also told the magazine that the Trump team is planning to release a report of its own to refute Mueller's findings.

It’s own report. Hmm, I’m guessing it will be about half a page long, double-spaced, and with 3-inch margins. It will be written in all caps, and at least 50 percent of the words will be “no,” “collusion,” “crooked,” “Hillary,” “very,” “unfair,” “witch,” and “hunt.” And it’s safe to assume that it will also contain far more Arby’s stains than logic or complete sentences.

So I guess this is how you prove your innocence in TrumpWorld: Bury evidence of your guilt.

Works for the mafia, so why the hell not?


Yo! Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing is now available at Amazon! Buy there (or at one of the other fine online retailers carrying it), or be square.