The Politicus

Create | Share | Influence

Duck Dynasty star Phil Robertson: Jesus is my health care

2 min read

Let’s just take a step back and marvel at what we’ve become.

A guy in a Methuselah beard and camo headband who claims he didn’t have health insurance for 50 years appears on the top-rated cable news network’s signature business show to argue in favor of his health care plan, and that plan is this: Don’ worry ‘bout nuffin’ ‘cause Jesus gon’ raise you from the dead.

I only wish I were kidding.

Huffington Post:

Robertson took exception to Sen. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.) backing a “Medicare for all” plan to create a single-payer system for health care.

“Kamala, I already have health care. It’s given to me by God. Eternal health care,” he said.

“The temporary reprieve is not worth it. I’m telling her, I have eternal health care and it’s free. Doctors can give you a little temporary reprieve, but they cannot save you from physical death. The doctors who treat you, they die, too.”

“But you’re not dismissing that we need, people need health care, right?” [Fox News host Neil] Cavuto asked.  

“I didn’t have health care for 50 years,” Robertson said.

And, yes, there’s audio, just in case your employer doesn’t offer vision coverage and/or Jesus hasn’t cast the requisite number of demons out of you yet:

Yeah, I liked Kamala Harris, too, but I don’t think she’ll ever recover from this epic pwn.

Well done, Phil. You’ve saved America. Again.

***

Yo! Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing is now available at Amazon! Buy there (or at one of the other fine online retailers carrying it), or be square.

****

But wait, there’s more! The Fierce, Fabulous (and Mostly Fictional) Adventures of Mike Ponce, America’s First Gay Vice President is also available at Amazon! You can get two great political humor ebooks for less than the price of the coffee you’ll be spitting out on your tablet when you read them!

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

0 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

The Politicus is a collaborative political community that facilitates content creation directly on the site. Our goal is to make the political conversation accessible to everyone.

Any donations we receive will go into writer outreach. That could be advertising on Facebook, Twitter, and Reddit or person-to-person outreach on College campuses. Please help if you can:

0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x