Dow drops nearly 800 points after Trump calls himself 'Tariff Man'

Early this morning, Donald Trump tweeted some homespun wisdom:

The negotiations with China have already started. Unless extended, they will end 90 days from the date of our wonderful and very warm dinner with President Xi in Argentina. Bob Lighthizer will be working closely with Steve Mnuchin, Larry Kudlow, Wilbur Ross and Peter Navarro…..

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 4, 2018

……on seeing whether or not a REAL deal with China is actually possible. If it is, we will get it done. China is supposed to start buying Agricultural product and more immediately. President Xi and I want this deal to happen, and it probably will. But if not remember,……

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 4, 2018

….I am a Tariff Man. When people or countries come in to raid the great wealth of our Nation, I want them to pay for the privilege of doing so. It will always be the best way to max out our economic power. We are right now taking in $billions in Tariffs. MAKE AMERICA RICH AGAIN

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 4, 2018

And then this happened:

Tariff Man is by far the worst new Marvel character ever. And they actually had a supervillain named Asbestos Lady. (Not to be confused with Asbestos Man, who is also Trump.)

I could write a long, very trenchant diary about how tariffs don’t work and Trump has the policy instincts of a dying sea cucumber, but what’s the point, really? (For one thing, foreign countries don’t pay our tariffs; we do.)

Instead, how about an infinite regression of Trump taco bowl brains?

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Yo! Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing is now available at Amazon! Buy there (or at one of the other fine online retailers carrying it), or be square.

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But wait, there’s more! The Fierce, Fabulous (and Mostly Fictional) Adventures of Mike Ponce, America’s First Gay Vice President is also available at Amazon! You can get two great political humor ebooks for less than the price of the coffee you’ll be spitting out on your tablet when you read them!