Oh, yes. As every publicist knows, the best way to handle a PR crisis is to bring up the awful thing you desperately want people to forget about five or more years after the fact. This is the stable-iest, most genius-y thing I’ve ever heard. Donald Trump, whose numerous grievances tend to spontaneously burst forth like whack-a-moles when you least expect it, just reminded us that he is not—repeat, not—into golden showers. Though he obviously thinks about them frequently enough to bring them up five years after the Steele Dossier suggested that there might be a pee tape involving Trump, said showers, and some Moscow sex workers.

According to The Washington Post, golden showers were top of mind for Trump at a National Republican Senatorial Committee donor retreat in Palm Beach, Florida, on Thursday. Because, well, he’s Donald Trump, and he has no filter:

“It was all phony s—, okay. All phony stuff,” he said of the Democratic impeachment efforts and the investigation of his ties to Russia.

Unprompted, he brought up an unsubstantiated claim he had interactions with prostitutes in Moscow before he ran for president.
“I’m not into golden showers,” he told the crowd. “You know the great thing, our great first lady — ‘That one,’ she said, ‘I don’t believe that one.’ ”

Jesus Jell-O-Gargling Christ. That totes sounds like a dude who’s into golden showers.

Now, I’ve never forgotten about the pee tape accusations—I’ve written a movie treatment based on the alleged incident that I’ll be pitching to the Hallmark Channel later this fall—but I’m sure some Americans had. And now they remember it, too.

I have no idea if the allegations are true, of course, though I’ve been leaning toward disbelieving them. Now I’m not so sure.

But, hey, maybe Donnie can bring this up again closer to the midterms. It may distract Republican voters from his mounting legal troubles. Or not. Either way is fine with me.

It made comedian Sarah Silverman say, “THIS IS FUCKING BRILLIANT,” and prompted author Stephen King to shout “Pulitzer Prize!!!” (on Twitter, that is). What is it? The viral letter that launched four hilarious Trump-trolling books. Get them all, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Or, if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE.

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