So this unequivocal Trump denial sure didn't age well

Granted, “Donald Trump lies” is breaking news in the same way that “Drunk Packers fan still confused about Higgs boson*” is breaking news, but this particular lie is pretty memorable (or should be, anyway) and egregious: x NEW: Pres. Trump tells reporters he did not know about $130,000 payment to Stormy Daniels before the 2016 election….

Who will ultimately bring down Trump? You'll never guess.

It won’t be Michael Cohen. And it won’t be Michael Flynn either. Forget about Paul Manafort while you’re at it, and he can take Rick Gates and Don McGahn with him. Yeah, I know, their faces are all as universally recognizable as Fabio’s pecs, and they all have, like, kick ass stories to tell, but…

Remember National Enquirer publisher David Pecker? He just shivved Trump. Enjoy

Whoops. I guess colluding with the media to bury all your worst, most sordid secrets doesn’t always pan out after all. CNBC reporter John Harwood has the latest in “I’m-a-Horny-Ocher-Dumbass-Gate”: x US Atty from Southern District of NY announces it won't prosecute American Media after firm, headed by Trump friend David Pecker, admits it acted…

Trump pal David Pecker is cooperating with prosecutors

And BOOM goes the dynamite. More horrible, horrible, horrible #fakenews for our pr*sident. Another one of his old chums has tossed him under the trolley. x PER @WSJ : David Pecker, the chairman of AMI, which publishes the @NatEnquirer , provided prosecutors with details about payments Mr. Cohen arranged with women who alleged sexual encounters…

I gotta hand it to AMI's David Pecker. Even I'm not THIS funny!

OK, game over. I give up. I spent years making a living as a comic, ridiculing reality, but come on, reality can't be this stupid. The only thing left for me to do now is to give up all of my earthly possessions, and make a pilgrimage to a Trappist monastery. First, the “setup” as…