I seem to remember a certain dyspeptic yam golem going Trump-shit every time there was a shooting by anyone with any ties whatsoever to the Middle East. This was back in 2015, when every such tragedy could be safely laid at the feet of Barack Obama for the dual crimes of having a foreign-sounding name and supposedly not being “tough” enough.
That rage was tossed to Trump’s hungry racist minions, who swallowed it whole and eventually shit it out as Trump administration policy.
So we got a Muslim ban that somehow didn’t apply to Saudi Arabia, the country that incubated the vast majority of the 9/11 hijackers.
We’ll likely never know just how many conflicts of interest Trump has pertaining to Saudi Arabia because he hides his tax returns like John Wayne Gacy guarded his crawlspace.
So after Mohammed Alshamrani, a 21-year-old Royal Saudi Air Force officer and student naval flight officer, killed three American sailors at Naval Air Station Pensacola in Florida over the weekend, you’d have thought Donald Trump, terrorist fighter, would be in a righteous lather over all this.
Well, not so much.
The kingdom is often slow to offer official responses, especially on a Friday, which is considered the holiest day of the week in Saudi Arabia. But the same day of the shooting, King Salman bin Abdulaziz Al-Saud spoke to Trump over the phone. He also quickly instructed his own security services to cooperate fully with US investigators. Lawyers from Saudi Arabia have also been sent to Florida.Trump relayed that the king's Friday message to him was that “the Saudi people are greatly angered by the barbaric actions of the shooter, and that this person in no way shape or form represents the feelings of the Saudi people who love the American people.”
And on Sunday, Trump spoke to Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman. According to the White House's readout of the call, the prince “reiterated Saudi Arabia's commitment to working with the United States to prevent a horrific attack like the Pensacola shooting from ever happening again. The President thanked the Crown Prince for Saudi Arabia's assistance with the investigation and continued partnership.”
Oh, yes, the Saudis are the real victims in all this. Let’s not upset the Saudis. They might not let Trump build a tower in their country after this “president” cosplay is all over.
And, hey, this is weird:
Defense Secretary Mark Esper Sunday confirmed one or two Saudi nationals filmed the Pensacola attack. It is not clear why they were filming it, he said. Esper said some Saudi friends of shooter Alshamrani were detained after the incident, and that one or two of those friends filmed the attack.
So other Saudis filmed the attack and we’re supposed to assume that’s just … normal?
It’s times like these when I sure wish I knew the full extent of Donald Trump’s business dealings with the Saudis. Call me crazy, but I think he’s guilty of a double standard here.
Yo! Pennyfarthing’s Trump-trashing series is now a trilogy! Grab your copy of Dear Pr*sident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing. It’s hot off the presses! And, of course, Dear F*cking Lunatic and Dear F*cking Moron are still selling like hot-magma-cakes, so get yours now. Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” diversions from our temporary hell on Earth.