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Fox News host: 'Donald Trump can outwork anyone'

Do NOT sip coffee before reading this.

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You’ve been warned.

Rachel Campos-Duffy was on the weekend version of Fox & Friends yesterday (which is just as dumb as the regular Fox & Friends, but with no Brian Kilmeade to make the brain farts extra pungent).

Anyway, she appeared on the show with her husband, Rep. Sean Duffy, who’s the second-most famous celebrity from Hayward, Wisconsin, after that giant muskie statue.

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She was a reality show star in real life, and so was he — because that’s how we run our government now.

“Feed me your Friday night perch dinners and I will shit out a congressman better than Sean Duffy!”

Anyway, she said this:

“Donald Trump has so much energy. One of the things that they’ve been talking about is Joe Biden not just being a gaffe machine but really not having the stamina to keep up. I mean, Donald Trump can outwork anyone and he’s, I think, the only president who actually starts to look younger in office.”

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“Donald Trump can outwork anyone.”

Uh huh. 

I once helped my dad haul wood for our fireplace during a particularly cold winter in Wisconsin. I’ve been resting on my laurels ever since. And I’m a way harder worker than Donald Trump.

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And he looks younger since being elected? Donald Trump looks like 12 different kinds of scrotum patched together with gently used dental floss and gum. Does he look like a younger version of that now? Maybe … but, well, what difference does that make, honestly?

I mean, just because he sweats like a longshoreman whenever he eats anything that requires chewing doesn’t mean he’s working.

How long can Fox keep tearing at the fabric of reality like this before a wormhole opens up and swallows the building?

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Not long, I hope.

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